Skinny Alf and Chubby Jess have been telling me how excited they are about christmas celebrations which are approaching fast. They said that mom will be putting a tree in the house; I said there’s no dirt in the house to put it in, they’d be better off sticking it in the garden. They said it was a special kind of tree, this one wasn’t real: “what? Like an illusion?” They rolled their eyes as if I was being thick, “Bones, don’t be silly it’s a tree but a fake one.” “Uh? What’s the point of a fake tree,” I wondered. “They can’t have a real one because the needles fall on the floor and you’d get them in your paws and up your nose and you’d eat them because that’s what you are like.” Jess told me haughtily. “Needles? Trees grow leaves not needles!” I yelped in horror, imagining a tree full of syringes like mom uses to give Jess her insulin. They looked at each other then back at me, Alf burst out laughing but Jess just groaned.
I worry about this needle tree, if I’m going to cock my leg up it then there is a strong possibility I could do myself some real damage!
From all the information I’ve been able to gather, it seems that christmas is a time for tearing brightly coloured paper and running around with bits of sticky tape on your fur. You get presents, I love presents. Mom and dad went out on sunday morning and came back with the bags they get from the pet superstore. They wouldn’t let us see what they had bought so I’m surmising that we’ve definately got presents coming. I saw a big thing that they carried in which I was excited about but its not for me, Alf told me it was for the cats to sharpen their claws on; I really don’t think that’s a good idea. If the evil Raffles sharpens his claws, guess whose hide they end up in?